“That looks like a dinosaur’s toenail clipping!” Jinpei cried as the image appeared on the screen.
“Well, yes, I suppose it does.” Dr. Nambu sounded a bit amused as he and the Science Ninja Team looked at a picture of a horn-like (or toenail-like) object on the bank of a narrow river winding along a canyon floor.
Dr. Nambu zoomed in on the object, revealing frayed wires and twisted ends of girders sticking out one end. “But it’s actually part of a sophisticated mecha with rock particles bonded to it.
“It’s impossible for us to make suck a finely detailed mecha,” he continued, “even here at the ISO, so we believe it can only be part of a Galactor mecha monster.”
“It’s impressive;” Joe said, “even though it looks like that piece was blown off in a large explosion, it doesn’t seem to have sustained much damage.
“So let’s go blow that mecha back to the Stone Age!” he added without taking a breath between sentences.
“Why are you so hellbent on getting out of here?” Ken asked.
“Because the plot always gets bogged down during these slide shows!”
“Now I wouldn’t say that –“
“Oh yeah? Then why did Ryu just fall asleep standing up?”
“Wha– ?” Ryu sputtered, “I wasn’t snoring, I swear! I just have a little sinus infection, that’s all!”
“All right, then,” Dr. Nambu said, “I’ll give you the details while you’re in transit to Break Town. However, there are a few things you need to know before you go.
“First, Galactor’s headquarters could be in the area, or it could just as easily be a trap. Second,” he continued, “Mammoth Canyon is too narrow for the God Phoenix, so you’ll have to take a canoe fitted with an outboard motor when you search the area. And, finally, you’ll have to stay in Bird Style the entire time you’re there.”
“Why’s that, Hakase?” Jun asked.
“The Okora Paradigm.” The doctor answered.
“Of course!” Ryu cried, “That has got to be THE dumbest, most annoying –“
“According to my calculations,” Dr. Nambu continued as if Ryu had said nothing, “if you don’t stay in Bird Style, the mesa nearest to Break Town will collapse, burying its residents in tons of stone. Plus, Bluestone National Park will be overrun by rabid, vegan chupacabras.”
The doctor paused a moment to let the weight of his words sink in. He concluded the meeting with, “Be careful and good luck!”
* * * * *
If boredom was a black hole, Ryu was its singularity. He sat in the God Phoenix with his feet up on his console, stifling yet another yawn.
“Man, this sucks.” he muttered to himself. Soon he was dozing off.
Meanwhile, a car with a canoe strapped to its roof made its way down into a ravine too narrow for the God Phoenix.
“Man, this happens to Ryu all the time.” Joe said as he drove. He sounded almost sorry for the Owl.
“Ryu understands what his job is.” Ken, sitting on the passenger side, replied.
“Ken, nobody reads the ‘Terms of Agreement’ crap before clicking on the ‘I Accept’ button!” Joe retorted.
“Especially if you’re in a hurry to get to the Internet porn!” Jinpei added from the back seat.
Jun let out a shocked cry. She was so shocked by Jinpei’s comment that she forgot to slap him.
“What?” Jinpei said in an innocent tone, “Ryu said he just reads the articles. . .”
It was hard for Joe to not double over with laughter. Ken made a mental note to have a talk with Ryu. . .
Just then a Jeep raced up behind them, its horn blaring. Not being one to pass up a challenge, Joe pressed the accelerator to the floor. Both vehicles were in a road raging duel on a road with barely enough room for one of them.
“Um, Joe,” Jun said nervously, “maybe you shouldn’t antagonize –“
The Jeep skirted past them, and they got a good look at the driver as he glared at them. His eyes had the kind of hatred they’d only seen in Galactor agents, and he clearly used Clairol’s Bad Guy Blond #7 to color his hair.
But then the competition suddenly seemed to be over; Joe slipped past the Jeep and put some distance between them.
“Take that, you jerk!” Jinpei yelled at the back window.
Just then a boulder came crashing down from a cliff above. Joe swerved to miss the rock only to send the car off the edge of the road.
Thanks to a cable gun and quick thinking, the car rocked and swayed as a metal line embedded in the canyon walls strained to keep it in midair.
The strange man stared down from the spot where he’d pushed the boulder. He had a smug look on his face. First, he’d had the advantage of knowing the shortcuts in this area. Second, it would be a matter of moments until the Science Ninja Team would fall to certain death. Mission accomplished.
The man got back into his Jeep and drove away.
* * * * *
Just over a half hour later the car containing the Science Ninja Team pulled into Break Town. There were no signs of it being run off the road or dangling by Joe’s cable gun high above the canyon floor.
Once again Science Ninja Team Technique: Convenient Plot Device saved the day. Though, truth be told, that situation was so perilous that they probably didn’t have the strength to use that technique again during this mission.
Soon they were in Break Town’s most popular restaurant during the busiest time of day. . . . which meant they were the only customers there.
The owner – a man who looked like he was more ancient than the average mummy – balanced a large tray as he made his way over to the four ninjas’ table.
“There you are. Thanks for waiting.” he said as he set a plate before each of his customers.
“I’m so hungry even this looks good!” Jinpei cried an instant before he started shoveling chocolate-colored noodles into his mouth.
“I was going to ask where you kids are from, but I can see you’re from Hippieland!”
“What?” Ken was startled by this. “Why do you say – ?”
The old man gestured toward Jinpei. Somehow the Swallow managed to pull out the souvenir wig he’d bought at the last Demon 5 concert and put it on over his helmet.
“You look ridiculous!” Jun scoffed as she snatched the wig off the youngest ninja.
“I was just trying to blend in!” Jinpei protested.
“So, where are you headed, then?” the old man asked.
“We’re going to paddle up the Yellow River to Mammoth Canyon.” Ken answered as he scooped up some noodles.
The restaurant owner looked shocked. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you!”
“Why not?” Joe demanded.
“Because of the scourge of the Death Buffalo!” the old man replied in a tone that suggested that everyone should know this. “You’ll never make it back alive!”
“What’s ‘scourge’?” Jinpei asked.
“Look in the mirror –“ Jun quietly replied, “you’ve proven to be my scourge many times!”
“Apparently you kids know nothing about it,” the man continued, “but deep in the canyon is a little grave called ‘The City of the Moon’. Since olden times, only those near death have gone near the place. It’s said there’s a protector of the grave called the Death Buffalo!”
“Henry, you old fool, put that little flashlight away!” an elderly lady shouted from another room, “Shining it under your chin won’t make the story any scarier – they’re too old to fall for that trick, and it’s the middle of the day!”
Grumbling, the old man slipped a penlight back into a trouser pocket. “Legend has it,” he continued, “that he ruthlessly kills anyone who enters the canyon.
“Give up on the canyon and go somewhere else!” he added, “It doesn’t pay to provoke the gods!”
“Provoke the gods?!” the old lady shrieked from the other room, “What did Reverend Randy tell you about talking like that?!”
The old man threw up his hands before shuffling back into the kitchen, muttering as he went.
“Sounds like a perfect cover for a Galactor base.” Joe said as soon as the restaurant owner was out of earshot.
* * * * *
A man in a dark trench coat and matching fedora walked up to the spot where the Science Ninja Team had just embarked on their journey up the Yellow River.
Who was he? Was he looking for something other than a heat stroke? Did he think the Science Ninjas were part of a whitewater canoeing expedition he’d been hoping to join? It was hard for the casual observer to say.
His Galactor tie tack glistened in the intense desert sun as he pulled a small radio out of a coat pocket.
“Agent Two here.” he said into the radio, “Looks like Gatchaman and the others just started making their way upstream.”
He returned the radio to its pocked and pulled out a Galactor-print handkerchief. He mopped the sweat off his face as he headed back the way he came.
* * * * *
“So they just waltzed out here just like we suspected.” Berg Katse stroked his chin as he considered this. “If that scrap was enough to lure them out, then it was a bargain!”
He watched a wall of monitors. Each monitor had a direct feed to a hidden camera placed somewhere along the river or on one of the surrounding cliffs.
Standing a short distance behind him was Billy Badstereotype of the Nocomprendo Nada nation, another rising star in the galaxy of Galactor commanders.
Billy was a paunchy man in a red and white leotard; it was hard to tell where the leotard ended and the matching body paint began. Still, those who had served with him a while found this unflattering outfit an improvement over what he used to wear: a poor-fitting loincloth.
“Just you wait, Science Ninja Team!” Katse snarled, “I’ll get you yet!”
“You can say that again, Kemosabe!” Billy said.
“Don’t call me that!” Katse snapped, “I know what ‘kemosabe’ really means!”
“Oh. Sorry, Chief. . . . Um, Chief?”
“What?”
“Could you tell me what it means? I’ve only heard it used in old western movies.”
Before he could answer, Katse’s attention snapped back to the monitors. “Here they are!” he laughed as the Science Ninjas came into view of the first river-level camera, “They really DID take the bait!
“Good. . . good. . .” Katse continued in a coaxing tone, “Keep coming further in. . . “
Katse, Billy, and the henchmen controlling the cameras were too focused on the Science Ninja Team to notice the blond Jeep driver running along a cliff with a rifle slung over his shoulder.
The man who ran the ninjas off the road had been cursing his luck ever since he’d been online a short while ago. He’d gone to the Official Science Ninja Team’s Facebook Page and found that it had been updated to say, “Some stupid jerk just tried to kill us, but he failed! So NYAH!”
“Billy, don’t do anything until I give the word.” Katse ordered as he kept his eyes on the monitor showing the canoe.
“Right, Chief!”
The blond man rested his elbows on a large rock as he took careful aim at the Eagle.
“Die!” he growled as he pulled the trigger. However, an elbow slipped at that moment, causing the bullet to go into the canoe between Joe and Jun.
Acting as one, the ninjas capsized the canoe and took cover beneath it.
The anger grew in the would-be assassin’s face as he reloaded and fired his rifle. Even though he shot another hole in the canoe, there was no sign he hit any of his targets.
“Damn it!” Katse shouted, “Who in the hell is out there bird hunting? I told you not to give any orders until I gave the word!”
“None of my people would have done it.” Billy Badstereotype replied, “I don’t think whoever did it even had a hunting license.”
“Sir,” one of the henchmen controlling the cameras said, “there’s a suspicious character on the bluff under the billboard for the Nocomprendo Nada Tribe’s casino.”
“Zoom in on him.” Katse commanded. Then, when the blond man came into focus – “Who the hell’s the kid with the rifle?” Katse clearly was expecting someone more impressive-looking.
“Don’t know, Chief.” Billy replied, “I don’t think he’s in Galactor.”
“Why,” Galactor’s leader growled, “would someone who isn’t one of ours be targeting the Science Ninja team?”
“Maybe they won’t acknowledge him on Twitter?” Billy answered.
“Catch him!” Katse shrieked as he hit Billy upside the head, “I’m not letting some pop gun punk get in my way!”
* * * * *
“I’ve heard of some really bad cases of road rage, but DAMN!” Joe proclaimed as the ninjas sheltered just inside a cave carved by the river.
“You know,” Ken said, “that guy could be working for Galactor.”
“Ya think?” Joe muttered under his breath. Then he added in a more normal tone, “I’ll be he’s right outside waiting to take another shot at us.”
“So what do we do now?” Jinpei asked a little nervously.
Ken said, “We didn’t come this far just to turn back with our tails between our legs like a bunch of spineless jellyfish with yellow streaks running up our spines –“
“I’m not running from jack!” Joe declared before Ken could mix any more metaphors.
“Hey, check it out, Ken.” the Condor added, “It looks like this cavern goes on upstream. What do you think?”
“So if we go through this cave instead, we won’t get shot at anymore!” Jinpei sounded overjoyed at this thought.
“All right,” said Ken, “let’s repair the canoe and head that way!”
Jinpei moved in closer to Jun and said in a hushed tone,” Hey, Sis, maybe you should sit up front with Aniki.”
“Why?”
“Because this is the closest you’ll ever get to being in the Tunnel of Love!”
Jun slapped the back of Jinpei’s helmet.
* * * * *
“Gorton, report!”
“Target’s in sight. We’ll have him momentarily.”
Gorton peered through his mask at his target: a blond man with a rifle slung over his shoulder. Was he actually trying to climb down the cliff with just an ordinary rope? What an idiot!
The Galactor grunt grinned as the helicopter he was in drew close enough to the man to snatch him up in a net.
Gorton found this so much easier than his commercial fishing days.
* * * * *
Traveling along the underground stream proved to be so much easier than the main river branch outside. For one thing, the ninjas didn’t have to deal with the sniper. Also, there were no rocks that could wreck the canoe. And the outboard motor easily propelled the team forward.
Yet the Eagle and the Condor continued paddling. Perhaps they were releasing some tension that remained from the encounter outside. Or maybe they thought the Swan would appreciate watching their muscles work beneath the tight Bird Styles. . . .
* * * * *
“How about it? If you join Galactor, we can take them down together.” Katse said. The would-be sniper had been brought before him and was flanked by two goons.
“What do you say?” Katse asked one more time.
“You mean you jokers are Galactor?” the man said with a sneer. Then, without warning –
“Ugh! Lugging loogies at me won’t help your cause!” Katse yelled as he wiped spit from his mask.
“I don’t see much difference between you and the Science Ninja Team – I hate you all!” the man hissed.
Katse made a small gesture, and the flanking henchmen dragged the blond man away.
“Lord Katse,” a henchman at the monitors said, “the Science Ninja Team is still coming upstream through the drainage cave.”
“Well, how about that? They think they’re taking a shortcut to come see me.” Katse was almost crowing.
* * * * *
“Ken, I think I see something ahead.” Jun said.
“It looks like we’ve come to the end of the line.” Ken replied.
“It looks like some kind of underground lake.” Joe remarked.
An enormous door thundered down behind them, eliminating the only escape route they knew of.
“Be careful,” Ken instructed the others, “it looks like we found Galactor’s base.”
Then he noticed the flashing neon sign on the wall ahead of them. It read: “Galactor welcomes its newest prisoners!”
A whirlpool formed under the canoe. And, in an additional show of obnoxiousness, there was a flushing sound as the water drained out of the chamber.
The Science Ninjas fell out of the canoe as it was pulled through the drain. They landed in a large net.
“Hey, look!” Jinpei cried as soon as he got his bearings, “There’s the guy from the Jeep!”
The blond man who tried to kill them was tied to a pole a short distance below them. Water went up to his knees. He was slouched over as if he’d been beaten.
“Guess he wasn’t with Galactor after all.” Jinpei added.
“Yeah.” Ken replied, “But right now we’ve got to get out of this net!”
A familiar evil laugh echoed in the chamber. Two panels were raised in a wall. Behind protective glass were Katse, Billy Badstereotype, and a small entourage of henchmen. They were positioned to easily see everything in the chamber.
“You sure stuck your foot in it this time!” Katse crowed, “Galactor’s headquarters here? Give me a friggin’ break!”
“We haven’t even begun to fight, Katse!” Ken shouted as he brandished his boomerang.
“Good grief, Gatchaman,” Katse answered with a slight whine in his voice, “can’t you come up with something original to say?” He flipped a switch, electrifying the net. His grin grew impossibly large as the ninjas let out an anguished shriek.
“Looks like we’re having Kentucky Fried Chicken tonight!” he gleefully said, “So what do you guys want – Original or Extra Crispy Recipe?”
Katse increased the current to the net, and the ninjas let out another yelp of pain.
“I’m toasting over here!” Jinpei cried.
“Jinpei, we’re going to escape with Ninja Technique: Bird Cross!” Ken shouted in response.
“Go for it!” Joe gasped.
There was a sudden blur before the net fell into shreds.
“Bring the guns online!” Katse bellowed, “Fill them full of holes!”
Several guns emerged from newly-revealed ports in the walls and automatically began firing. However, none came close to hitting their marks. The four ninjas dropped to the flooded floor unharmed.
Ken went over to the blond man and lifted his head to look him in the eyes. “Come on,” Ken said, “pull yourself together.”
“Shoot them!” Katse ranted.
“Sorry, Chief,” Billy Badstereotype replied, “the thundersticks don’t reach that far.”
Jun pulled out her yo-yo and sent it flying toward the open drainage doors far above. Joe fired his cable gun in the same direction. Ken and the blond man grabbed hold of Joe, and Jinpei held onto Jun. Within seconds they were all headed toward the ceiling.
“I won’t let you escape!” Katse shouted. With that, a henchman hurried out into the chamber and pulled the only lever sticking out of a wall.
“Hey, watch out!” Jinpei cried as soon as he saw the ceiling close over them. He managed to scurry through the gap before it completely closed.
Everyone else, however, tumbled back toward the floor.
Shackles flew out of a wall and latched onto the wrists of the remaining three ninjas. The blond man, unwanted and unloved, splashed into the water below.
The shackles’ chains retracted, pulling the threesome against the wall.
“Oh wow.” one of the goons breathed, “The boss must have read my fantasy journal!”
Katse let out an even more evil laugh. “I’ve hooked you real good now, and you’re too meaty to toss back in the ocean. I think I’ll debone you, scale you, and cook you up good!”
“Um, Chief,” Billy quietly said into Katse’s ear, “I’m confused. When they were in the net, you said they were chickens. Now you’re talking like they’re fish. . .”
“I’m sick of listening to your blithering speeches!” Ken declared defiantly, “Shut up and get it over with!”
A couple of the henchmen started drooling at the thought of what might come next.
“Those will be your last words, Gatchaman!”
The henchman sitting at the console to the Galactor leader’s right pressed a button. The guns protruding from the wall retracted and were replaced by flame throwers.
“Now,” Katse commanded, “set the flame guns to extra crispy.”
“Now we’re back to chicken!” Billy moaned as he rubbed the bridge of his nose. His confusion was giving him a headache.
Another thought occurred to him. “Um, Chief, the midget boy isn’t with them.”
“So?” Katse replied, “A gnat can’t escape this place, let alone some twerp whose balls haven’t dropped yet!”
Meanwhile, Jinpei crouched behind a boulder not far from the chamber holding his teammates. He could think of only one thing to do.
“Ryu, this is G-4!” he said into his communicator, “Come in!”
The only response was a snore.
“Damn it, what am I going to do now?” the Swallow cried in frustration. It was bad enough to hear that sound under normal circumstances – it meant that Jinpei would get stuck with the job of cleaning dried drool and snot off the console – but now. . .
“Calling shorty pants!” Katse’s voice boomed over a hidden speaker system, “Attention shorty pants!”
“I’m not short, you pointy-eared rat!” Jinpei shouted back.
“Fine, you vertically-challenged dweeb! I just wanted to let you know the calvary ain’t comin’. So if you don’t give yourself up quietly, your friends will be char-grilled!”
Jinpei’s blood ran cold.
“Maybe we’ll start with Eagle burgers. . . or maybe you’d prefer Condor kabobs?”
“Now I’m really confused, Chief –“ Billy’s muffled voice came over the speakers.
“SHUT UP!” This time Katse’s voice was muffled as well. But then it came clearly over the audio system. “Now be a good boy. Give up and I’ll cancel the barbecue.”
“Don’t listen, Jinpei!” Ken’s defiant voice came from the Swallow’s bracelet, “Never mind about us – just get away from here!”
“That’s right, Jinpei!” Jun added, “You need to live so that you can come back and avenge our deaths!”
“Geez, what a drama queen!” one henchman muttered.
“That kid’s ‘To Do’ list must be a real bitch!” another replied, “First, avenge their deaths. Next, cure all forms of cancer. Then end world hunger. . .”
“Don’t be fooled!” Joe shouted into his communicator, “If you waltz out into the open you’ll just end up like us!”
Out of nowhere came a large whip that lashed Joe, causing him to shriek in pain.
“Oh wow.” a henchman sighed, “The boss must have found out about MY fantasy!”
“The glare in your stare deserves a reward, boy.” Katse snarled as he held the controls to the mechanical whips. “Think I’ll execute you first!”
“Go on.” Joe growled, his eyes locked on Katse, “I grew up to be what I am now thinking only of how much I want to kill you, so it’s no surprise you can see the hatred in my eye, you rat.”
“Oh wow.” all of the henchmen wistfully sighed.
“Hey!” Katse turned his attention to his underlings.
“Sorry, Lord Katse.” the grunt sitting to his left said, “It’s just that the Condor’s so. . .” Words suddenly failed him.
“So. . .” the henchman on the right tried to explain but found himself faltering as well.
“And how!” Billy concluded.
Katse let out a derisive snort and then glared at the Condor. “Okay, tough guy, let’s see how much you can take!”
The whips flew, striking Joe repeatedly, causing him to cry out in greater pain.
“Show yourself, shorty pants!” Katse called, “This is the last time I’ll tell you!”
“Jinpei, don’t let Katse provoke you!” Joe commanded through his agony.
“Even if we’re killed,” Ken added, “you live on with Ryu and defeat Galactor!”
“Jinpei, listen to us!” Jun implored her little brother.
“Hang tough, Sis!” Jinpei cried as tears streamed down his face.
Meanwhile, the blond man had pulled himself to his feet and staggered over to the lever that had been used to close the ceiling.
“I can’t wait anymore.” Katse grumbled, “Just torch the three of them.”
“Lord Katse,” a headphone-wearing henchman behind the Galactor leader said, “the radar’s picked up something that could be the God Phoenix.”
“What?” This news threw Katse. “That’s strange. From the signal we captured, it sounded as if he didn’t make contact.”
Galactor’s front man thought a moment and then shrugged. “Whatever. We’ll just torch the God Phoenix, too, while we’re at it.”
* * * * *
The God Phoenix flew over the rocky terrain. On the bridge was Ryu, wide awake and hoping Jinpei would forgive the Owl’s ruse to keep Galactor’s attention away.
Suddenly, something rose up before him. It looked like a mountain was moving.
“Damn, that’s a huge Kachina doll!” Ryu cried as soon as banked the ship around to get another look.
Galactor’s latest mechanized monstrosity resembled a Native Amerisian dancer – a bison’s head on a man’s body. The missing horn confirmed this was the mecha the Science Ninja Team was looking for.
As he felt the wall behind him shake and vibrate, Ken made a realization. “Hey, I think this base is the mecha!”
“Well, it looks like Gatchaman’s got a bird brain to match the bird look!” Katse scoffed.
The mecha opened its mouth and began spitting flames at the God Phoenix. However, the goons controlling the buffalo beast couldn’t adapt to Ryu’s piloting skills.
“You really need to lay off the chilies!” Ryu said as his fingers danced over the controls.
Meanwhile, inside the chamber, the would-be sniper pulled the lever, and the ceiling began opening. Jinpei saw the opportunity and let his bolas fly.
“Yeah, I just couldn’t handle the suit-and-tie routine.” a henchman at a console casually said to his neighbor. Just then, Jinpei’s bolas crashed through the glass, wrapped around the grunt’s neck, and exploded.
Katse let out an enraged yell as the manacles released, allowing the three ninjas to drop to the floor.
“Die, Gatchaman!” Katse yelled as he flipped a switch. The flame throwers belched into action.
The flames fell severely short of their mark.
Ken let his boomerang fly. The flame throwers were promptly sliced into two before exploding.
Billy Badstereotype rushed over to Katse. “Chief,” he said, “the last explosion knocked out our power!”
“Idiot!” Katse bellowed as he punched Billy, “Why are you so incompetent?”
“It’s one of the requirements for being a Galactor officer –“
“Shut up and fix the thing!”
The former sniper leaned heavily against the lever. Ken hurried over to him, saying, “You have my thanks.”
“I guess I was wrong about you guys.”
“Right now we need to get out of here.” Ken replied, “Put your arm around my neck.”
By this time Joe and Jun had made their way through the opening in the ceiling. She tossed her yo-yo back to Ken who caught it right away. She pulled Gatchaman and the blond man out of the room.
As soon as the blond guy was standing on his own, Ken contacted Ryu over the wrist communicator.
“I want you to set a Super Bird Missile to Level 10 and launch it straight at the Minotaur!” Ken commanded.
“Okay. . . . wait a minute. How do you know what the mecha looks like?” Ryu asked.
There was a small, slightly dramatic pause before Ken answered, “I’m Gatchaman. Of course I know!”
“Right.” Ryu answered in a tone he used only when he thought Ken was about to go off the deep end. But then he added, “Okay, it isn’t moving, so I can blast one right into its flank steak!”
“No. There was an explosion in the horn area, so it should be weak there. You should aim high.”
“All right! I finally get to blow stuff up!” Ryu was giddy as the reached for the red button.
It rained henchmen in the mecha’s control room when the missile punched through the ceiling and pierced the floor.
One of the few henchmen still standing let out a shriek and dashed toward the nearest exit. Billy was one step behind him.
Katse, however, would have none of that. “Hey, where do you think you’re going? You’ve gotta make a last stand here!”
“You say that,” Billy replied, “but you’re going to run away, aren’t you?”
Katse was gone like a spooked gazelle.
“How did you know?” the henchman asked Billy.
“It’s in the officers’ handbook.” Billy replied, “It’s in the section called, ‘So Your Mecha’s Being Blown To Hell’.”
Elsewhere, Ken pulled a few explosive charges from a compartment on his belt and tossed them at a wall. A second passed before a hole leading outside appeared.
The blond man and the four ninjas darted toward the newly created escape route.
But then something caught Joe’s eye. “He’s getting away!” the Condor cried as he turned to go back.
“We’ll have to catch Katse some other time!” Ken said as he grabbed Joe’s shoulder, “We’ve got to get out of here!”
* * * * *
Break Town just couldn’t catch a break. As soon as Katse’s escape rocket punched through the buffalo mecha’s remaining horn, there was an almost nuclear warhead-sized explosion.
A shattered butte, scorching-hot shards of mecha, and the flaming bodies of Galactor personnel rained down on the tiny town. The residents screamed and ran just like the people of Tokyo in a Godzilla movie.
* Z* * * *
The God Phoenix was parked on a mesa miles away from Break Town. The embers of the smouldering settlement complimented the light of the setting sun.
The entire Science Ninja Team stood by the front landing gear, and the man who tried to kill them stood before them.
“I thought the Science Ninja Team could do nothing but ruin my life.” he said to them.
“Why?” Ken asked, “What did we ever do to you?”
“I was a model.” he answered, “I was set to be the cute guy with no talent every teen and tween girl would have on her bedroom walls and school locker door!”
He put his hands on his hips and struck a pose. “School girls across Ameris would have my face and my bod on their notebooks. But then you guys came along and ruined it for me!
“All I ever hear is ‘Ooh, the Eagle’s SO gorgeous!’ or ‘The Condor seems SO troubled – if I were his girlfriend, I could make things right for him!’” He was yelling when he added, “They even say ‘I wish the swallow was my little brother instead of – ‘”
“But why did you try to kill ME?” Jun interrupted.
“Because every girl wants to be you just so they can get closer to those jerks you work with.”
“Oh.”
“Look,” Ken said, “I’m sorry your career plans got messed up, but –“
“BUT GET OVER IT!” Joe bellowed, “Do you think we fight Galactor for laughs?!”
“Hey,” Ryu said in a more moderate tone, “maybe if you had a gimmick – singing or acting or somethin’.”
“I never thought of that. . . . but doesn’t that mean I’d need some sort of talent?”
“Well,” Jinpei replied, “I can’t think of any celebrities with any real talent. . .”
“Good point.” the man said. “I’m sorry I bothered you all.” With that, he turned and walked away.
After a couple of moments Joe asked, “Is anybody else pissed off because the mecha wasn’t nearly as dangerous as that idiot?”
